High & Tight Legend Hangs ‘Em Up

WELLS, ME – After significant deliberation and amidst much speculation, League Founder and Prestige Worldwide Manager Lars Borssen formally submitted his resignation Sunday evening, ending an 11-year career in a league he started in 2005.

Borssen said growinh work and family obligations has gradually made it more difficult for him to keep up with what was once one of his favorite pastimes.

“I just don’t have the time. Work and kids have taken my life over,” said Borssen in a message to Commissioner Adam Leech on Sunday.  “Maybe in a few years when the kids go to school.”

“I’m proud of what I started and the fact that it has been around for  12 seasons is pretty cool, and how competitive it is.”

Borssen falls just shy of being the sixth member of the 1,000 win club, ending his last season with 982 and an overall winning percentage of 44.3%. A perennial top team, Prestige Worldwide’s had three straight years of at least 100 wins (2009-2011). However, performance in the years following was varied, including two last place finishes.

The infiltration of fatherhood and the impact on the league has reached near epidemic levels. It already claimed original owner Russ Stutsky in the offseason, despite one of the best groups of keepers in the league. It has also been blamed repeatedly for owner’s waning interest and forgetfulness at various points. So much so, Commissioner Leech has considered placing a moratorium on newborns for the upcoming season.

“This has to be stopped,” said Leech. “We’ve lost too many good men to procreation and so called ‘adult responsibilities.’ Therefore, I’ve instructed our legal team to investigate the potential for action to stop this nonsense so we can focus on what is most important:  fantasy baseball.”

As the first person in the league to have children, Leech said he understands the time commitment can be difficult. He encouraged fellow owners with young children to consider that there can be nothing more satisfying than cruising through box scores during some of the more tedious fatherly duties.

Leech, however, was quick to praise Borssen for his hard work and dedication.

“I still consider Lars the best commissioner I have ever played under, and that says a lot. I remember passively accepting his invitation to join Nolan Ryan Uppercuts in 2005, which morphed into a keeper league the next year.  For me, it eventually became an obsession,” said Leech.

“Since taking over for him in 2011-12, I’ve come to appreciate the work that is involved. His tenure wasn’t easy, but he was excellent at assessing the situation and knowing when an executive decision needed to be made or when something had to be put to vote. He made it fun, but also realized it needed to be fair and treated with respect.”

Among Borssen’s major accomplishments as commissioner was the successful ousting of perennial bottom-dweller Troy Brown, replacing categories like batting average and wins with on-base percentage and quality starters, starting the league blog, building the constitution, overseeing the recruiting of future league champions Jason Ouellette and Brian Bishop, and implementing penalties for poor play.

“One of the more underrated qualities of Lars was his willingness to adapt to make the league better. He never thought it was good enough, which is the only reason it has survived and flourished over 12 years,” said Leech. “He may have not won a championship, but his place in the overall standings don’t reflect how good he was at this. He built the foundation for what many consider to be the best fantasy league they’ve ever played in.”

The loss of Borssen and Stutsky, leaves the league with only four founding members remaining: Leech, Dave Fox, Pierce Cole, and Dagan Loisel.

Commissioner Leech is in the process of securing two replacements and is expected to formally announce the new league members in the coming days.

When hearing the news of Borssen’s retirement, long-time player Evan Longoria was visibly moved when talking about his departing manager.

“I remember when Mr. Borssen drafted me in the 10^th round of the 2008 draft. No one else believed in me. I saw guys like Rich Hill, Brett Myers, Brad Hawpe, and Jeff Francoeur go ahead of me and I almost gave up,” said Longoria, wiping a tear. “But he chose me and I’ve never wanted to be on any other team. After eight years together, we’ve become more than colleagues. We’ve become friends. I’ll always love Lars and am dedicating my 2016 season to him.”

Following Borssen’s announcement, Leech issued a proclamation stating that the league championship series will henceforth be called the Borssen Championship Series.

“The league won’t be the same,” said Leech. “But we have to move forward. I hope one day he comes back, re-invigorated. There will be something missing this season. You don’t just replace guys like Lars or the institutional history and appreciation for the league and the game.”